“Our youth, and their determination to fight this cruel world system. That’s what gives me hope. That, and organizations like Rainbow that fight to protect us.”
When Esan came out as gay at 19, growing up in a strict military, Pentecostal home in Guyana, everything changed. “All hell broke loose,” they recall. Facing physical abuse and death threats, they had no choice but to flee. Together with their partner, they made the journey to France, seeking safety — and a chance to live freely.
Today, after years of struggle, they’re finally able to walk hand in hand with the person they love — openly, joyfully, and without fear.
A Harsh Winter, a Difficult Start
Esan's journey to resettlement was anything but simple. “It was very difficult,” they say. “We arrived in France during the heart of winter. I was injured. We had no help at first — we had to sort everything out on our own.”
Eventually, Esan found support through local organizations that offered meals and guidance. Registration with OFII, the French Office for Immigration and Integration, opened access to temporary housing and minimal financial assistance. But more than government systems, it was the quiet solidarity of others — the people who showed up, helped them navigate the system, and stood beside them — that made all the difference.
Celebrating Pride with Chosen Family
This year, Esan will celebrate Pride as they always do — by taking their annual vacation in Paris. “It’s the one time of year I can celebrate my queerness with my queer family,” they say. “It’s like a big family reunion.”
That freedom wasn’t always a given. “Thanks to Rainbow Railroad, we’ve now spent five of our nine years together in a healthy and comfortable environment. I can walk freely with my partner and not have to hide our love. That’s what brings me joy.”
Finding Power in Visibility and Advocacy
This year’s Pride theme, Solidarity in Pride: Dare to Resist, speaks directly to Esan's experience. “It means fighting to be seen as normal,” they say. “To live in the same comfort as others. To be recognized for my talent and contributions — not judged because someone thinks my orientation isn’t accepted.”
For them, resistance means advocacy and action. “Speak out. Support our young queer people. Fight for legislative change. In too many countries, our lives are outlawed."
A Life Beyond Survival
Reflecting on their journey, they don’t mince words: “Rainbow Railroad was like a bridge between life and death… between living and just existing.”
Esan now focuses on building a life — not just surviving. “Queer liberation means emancipation. It means finally being able to focus on self-development instead of survival.”
And their hope? It comes from the next generation. “Our youth, and their determination to fight this cruel world system. That’s what gives me hope. That, and organizations like Rainbow that fight to protect us.”
To others still facing danger, Esan offers this message: “Reach out to organizations like Rainbow. Try to stay safe.”
Join the movement. Help at-risk LGBTQI+ individuals get to safety. Donate today.